my days without frens

im now sitting alone at gurney coffee bean... i suddenly feel that i dont have frens...
is it when ppl grown up and their fren will getting lesser?? do anyone have any comment on this?? i thought the circle of friends will growing bigger as the age of ppl growing too..
but my frens told me that it's wrong..it will grow lesser... but why?? recently i always alone no matter where am i.. so it make me feel that i dont have frens.. no matter at class or outside, im still alone...having lunch,dinner it still da same.... althought sometimes when having dinner vf housemate, but they are couple..so mke me feel im alone too... their close action makes me feel lonely...hmmm... today i felt very down..i dunno why...
my friends told me that v have to learnt this... friends will leave us while v growing up...
all of us have our own life and own dream to be fulfilled... so different place will v go... v wont be together for 30 years...there is the time for us to split up... i think too easy already... i thought friends will be by my side always...i thought i have a lot of friends...im wrong... i juz realized that i dont hve many friends actually...
and jo say can pass one day then juz one day lo...
and christmas coming soon.. how can i celebrate it... i dont have much frens here.. is it pass alone like pass few years?? without smallkids i think will be my sad birthday..this is my 20th birthday... i hope can pass happily.. christmas too...haiz...
thats all for today....i dunno what else cn i blog now..